Opt Outers Face Confusing Summer

Given the heightened alarm of some New York official, this, I imagine, is what the news from this coming summer will look like.


“Those who call for opting out really want New York to opt out of information that can help parents and teachers understand how well their students are doing,” said Jeanne Beattie, a state Education Department spokeswoman.

Summer vacation is supposed to be a time of camps, family vacations, and growth experiences for students and their families. But the massive opt out movement of last April has led to a confusing collapse of summer traditions.

Back in April, Jeanne Beattie, a state education department spokeswoman said “Those who call for opting out really want New York to opt out of information that can help parents and teachers understand how well their students are doing." Now in July, she has reportedly issued another statement-- "I told you so."

Evelyn Topdraggle of East Bestwig, NY, explains how opting out turned into a vacation nightmare.

"My daughter did not take the Common Core tests in April," said the working mom. "Consequently, when the year ended, I had no idea how she had done. Usually we reward our children with some fun outings to the City in July, but I suddenly realized that I have no idea whether my daughter deserves a reward or not."

Bob Wobble of Upper Wangdoodle, NY, echoes her sentiments. "Since my son didn't take the test, I have no information about how he is doing in his education. I have no idea how well he is doing. I have not been able to decide whether to ground him or to raise his allowance."

Some opt outers report family stress because of the lack of information from the tests whose results will not be reported for another two months. Said Keisha Tripsocket of Dumonde, NY, "I do not know whether to be angry or loving with my daughter. Did she do great, or terrible? Without the information from the tests, I don't know whether I should be affectionate or stern with her."

999 families report having made some serious mistakes with these summer months. Says Flerd Wadley of Boughgidie, NY, "We played it safe and enrolled our son in a summer remedial reading program. It cost us a bunch of extra money and we gave up some extras for the summer. One day I come home and find out he's read an entire stack of Charles Dickens and Toni Morrison. Damn kid could read all along! I sure wish I'd had him take that test so I had known."

Summer camps report declined enrollment as 999 families across the state are paralyzed, lacking even the most fundamental knowledge of how their students are growing and achieving educationally.

Not all families have been stumped. Said Tessa McNoodle of Vistaville, NY, "I was really confused at first since we opted out. But then I just talked to my child's teachers, paid attention to her homework and tests, looked at her report card, spent time with her, paid attention to her, and used my brain and common sense and was able to figure it out. I'm pretty sure that when those Common Core test scores eventually come out, they won't tell me anything I don't already know."